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It is my fondest hope that you are reading these while you should be working.   Isn't that what the net's really about anyways?   Sort of a place to go 'researching' while you should be getting stuff done!

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.

Never use the words 'Evil Diabolical Plan' on your resume.

Nobody notices what I do until I don't do it.

Not only do I not know what's going on, but I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.

Note on a door: Out to lunch... if not back by five, out for dinner also.

Of course I don't look busy.....I did it right the first time!

People who do the world's real work don't usually wear neckties.

Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

Quitters never win, and winners never quit, but those who never quit AND never win are idiots.

Quote from the Boss: I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.

REAL procrastination is watching a hungry bear walk up to you while having a picnic, and not running because hey, you've got the rest of your life.

Save time... see it my way.

Someday it's just not worth chewing through the restraints...

Sorry - yesterday was the deadline for all complaints.

Sorry I'm late, I'll leave early to make up for it.

Teamwork means: A lot of mindless idiots doing exactly what the boss says!

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

The best part about procrastination is that you are never bored, because you have all kinds of things that you should be doing.

The Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) has determined that the maximum safe load capacity on my butt is two persons at a time, unless I install handrails or safety straps. Since you have arrived sixth in line to RIDE MY ASS today, please take a number and WAIT YOUR TURN!

The only person getting his work done by Friday was Robinson Crusoe.

The only problem with mornings is that they happen too early in the day.

The problem with the rat race is even if you win you're still a rat. - Lily Tomlin

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

The trouble with work is... it's so daily.

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