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Don't know what that word means? Don't reach for your dictionary... check out Coolsig's definitions first. 'they're not correct, but they're fun'

Democracy: Three wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for supper.

Diamond: A chunk of coal that made it under pressure.

Dictionary: A book that tells you how to spell words you need to know how to spell in order to look them up a dictionary.

Dieting: Wishful shrinking.

Diplomacy: The ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way he looks forward to the trip.

Diplomacy: The art of saying 'Nice doggie!' ... till you can find a rock.

Diplomat: A man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

Disco: A din of iniquity.

Dummy: Sit in the tunnel and wait for the light to come to you!

e-i-e-i-o: A gross misspelling of the word 'farm'.

Eccentric: Too rich to be called crazy.

Economist: One who tells you what to do with your money after you've spent it.

Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny.

Experience: A comb life gives you after you lose your hair.

Expert: A person who knows a great deal about very little and who goes along knowing more and more about less and less, until finally he knows practically everything about nothing.

Fairy tales: Horror stories for children to get them used to reality.

Fashion: That which, while not necessarily beautiful, makes all that preceded it look silly.

Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

Foreploy: any misrepresentation of yourself for the express purpose of obtaining sex.

Frisbeetarianism: The belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

Gambling: The sure way of getting nothing for something.

Giraffiti: Concrete art spray-painted very, very high.

Hangover: The wrath of grapes.

Hardware: The parts of a computer system that can be kicked.

Honest politician: One who, when bought, stays bought.

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